The Office of the Dean of Students at Providence College > The CARE Team: Overly Persistent Demands
Overly Persistent Demands
Facts About Students Who are Demanding to an Unreasonable Degree:
- Students who are demanding can be intrusive and persistent and may require excessive time and attention.
- Demanding traits can be associated with anxiety; depression, personality problems and/or thought disorders, mania, and drug use/abuse.
- Possible characteristics of students who are unreasonably demanding include:
- A sense of entitlement
- An inability to empathize
- A need to control
- Difficulty in dealing with ambiguity
- Difficulty with structure and limits
- Fears about handling life
- Elevated mood
- Drug use or abuse
What You Can Do
- Talk to the student privately in a place that is safe and comfortable.
- Remain calm and take the lead by making clear that it is a discussion, not an argument.
- Set clear limits at the outset and hold the student to the allotted time for the discussion. Emphasize behaviors that are and aren’t acceptable.
- Respond quickly and with clear limits to behavior that disrupts class, study sessions, or consultations.
- Be prepared for likely manipulative requests and behaviors.
- Call the Dean of Students Office 401.865.1782 for help with identifying strategies for dealing with disruptive behaviors.
- Refer the student to Personal Counseling 401.865.2343 for counseling.
What You Should Avoid Doing
- Arguing with the student.
- Giving in to inappropriate requests.
- Unreasonably adjusting your schedule or policies to accommodate the student.
- Ignoring inappropriate behavior that has a negative impact on you or other students.
- Feeling obligated to take care of the student or feeling guilty for not doing more.
- Allowing the student to pressure or intimidate you to not deal with or to excuse the problematic behavior.